Simon’s Story: Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month
‘It takes support, courage, and communication; the first step of speaking to someone can be the tiny step that changes your life forever.’
Simon B, Independent Mental Health Advocate here at Mind in Salford.
By sharing his lived experience, Simon wants to encourage men to talk and seek support to live a healthier and happier life.
I was always a little withdrawn as a child and found it hard to fit into what every one else was doing. I felt like an outsider, and I tried really hard to play the game of being a social kid, but it never came naturally and I would often just retreat into music or quiet time alone. This, combined with being bullied, resulted in me building a shell around myself of humour and sarcasm to disarm others and to prevent them from seeing the real shy and vulnerable me.
I carried a lot of pain from childhood into my early adult life but then discovered friends and partying and threw myself into this thoroughly as it felt like an escape from the grip of loneliness and fear of being a child.
However, I only saw many years later, when the going out & partying went on for many years, that this was my way of self-medicating the deep pain that was unconscious but sitting underneath. I was trying to run away into substance misuse and a hedonistic lifestyle, but this never worked because I was always left back where I started, feeling isolated and alone and anxious about the world.
Following the death of my Mum and cat in the same year in my 30s, my anxiety and depression really took hold, and I was washed over by the force which made me retreat from life in fear. I was scared and suffering and didn’t know where to turn, but luckily, I had a few conversations with people about this which then pointed me towards mental health services, medication and therapy.
I devoted myself to my recovery journey and therapy entirely as I realised that none of the other things I had used in my life worked, and I was in crisis and desperately needed something to change. Throughout this journey of learning self-care and building a support network of friends and professionals over a decade, I came to honestly know myself and heal many of the open wounds from childhood. I feel blessed that I happened to have the proper support at the right time to help me turn towards my illness with kindness, as I know many people in the world do not have this.
I am really happy to say that mental illness is no longer part of my life, and I have a wide array of activities, practices and support to continue to grow my mental wellbeing. It is possible to heal from our illness and change, but it takes support, courage, and communication, so the first step of speaking to someone can be the tiny step that changes your life forever.
Posted on: 11th November 2024